dunno y...

dunno y i suddenly feel so sad...
just called him,
he says he wants to cum down to singapore
but din tell me where to meet, bus ticket also haven't book
haiz.... n then ask him whether wan go JB or singapore
he say up to me...
i like boys with a bit of his own opinion...
i dun like ppl like my ex bf,
wat also nid me to make d decision
though this is d first time my bf is lk tat
but i suddenly feel very sad
bcos when u say up to me,
i feel lk u dun care for me

n then u ask me y my voice sounded lk tat
i told u nothing,
bcos i dun want to let u know i am scared,
i feel like crying,
i am scared that the history wil repeat itself...
pls dun hurt me.. it pains a lot

honestly, i am stil very afraid that u wil cheat me
i dun understand what do u see in a girl 13 years younger than you,
i dunno y u can fall in love with me when we just knew each other for more than 1 month
don't you think everything is too fast
it's bcos it is too fast, i cant accept
i feel terrified... that is a normal reaction of a normal girl
it's a way of protecting themselves
i hope u understand..

i also understand that u r 32
erm... most of the guys at this age are already getting married
u say : " 不要姓赖啦。跟我一起姓温。"
u say : "我会慢慢还你三十寸金，照顾你一辈子，好不好？"
u say : " 连洗衣服都怕，那以后要怎么帮我洗衣？"
all these things u said to me, i feel afraid too,
like u wanna marry me alr,
maybe u r just kidding,
but i feel scared..
erm.. everything went on too fast

i dunno whether anyone can understand how i feel, and y do i feel this way
but,
in conclusion,
sometimes, i am just very afraid of u.
pls don't blame me, pls...
it's not that i dun like u, it's just i am scared
i have no sense of security...
maybe bcos u r far away too.

do you reli love me?
i am scared...
sometimes... i just feel like going beck to kl to find my frens (family)
would u all be there for me when i fall?
would u all be there when i am hurt?
为什么我谈恋爱终是会哭？我很怕。。。